“A pink necked girl in a redneck world.”

When I turned 21 years old I weighed 125 pounds and my height was 5’8″. Which made me look like Olive Oyl from Popeye cartoons in my mind. My favorite compliment was you look like a “tall, cool drink of water”.

Most women automatically disliked me on first sight of the only reason I was younger and an attractive female hanging out where the men folk were to be found. It became increasingly annoying getting followed into the restroom. I learned to travel with a girlfriend until I got fed up.  I’m a survivor of domestic abuse and no one is going to stick their finger in my face or hit me out of nonsense either. I will get back up so you better knock me out. By the time I was 23 I didn’t need to fist fight anymore.  They either liked me or they didn’t, but they knew what I was about by then. I was a pink necked girl in a redneck world. I had the time of my life being carefree and unfettered. I did what I wanted, when I wanted, and all the time.  

By the time I was 22 years old, I was bar tending at the nicest hotel lounge around here. Most of the men liked how I looked while I was pouring drinks and grabbing their beers. Any man more than 10 years older than myself intimidated me with their personality. All gruff and barking at me made me steer clear of all of them.
“And yes, I’ve got Daddy issues.”
They were polite and careful with their words when it became apparent I was uncomfortable around them. Once I got used to being the boss of these drunken fools, I came out of myself and became comfortable around my customers. 

I’ve always had rules for dating. Strict rules I always follow. I still follow these Golden Rules since I don’t want someone else’s man. I want my own man with no woman trying to interfere or cause drama.

“I’m not interested in dating your man. I repeat, I’m not interested in dating your man.”

Here are my golden rules.  I won’t date any of the following:

1. A married man. 

2. One who’s newly single that’s on the rebound.

3.  A man in any type of ongoing relationship that’s mad at his partner and trying to play head games with her.

When I wasn’t dating someone which was more often than not, then I was going through my overwhelming bad boy crush that lasted almost 10 years. TE was such a beautiful man with long golden hair, the true definition of what a man should look like in a pair of Levi’s and rode a Harley. TE took advantage of the fact that I thought I was “in love” with him. I was so infatuated with TE that he knew I wouldn’t go anywhere with another man while he was in my eye sight. He didn’t want to be with me all the time, but he wasn’t letting any other man think I was available to spend any of my nights with them. Thank God I wasn’t saddled with TE for the rest of my life by marriage or having his children. He was a grown ass man more issues than a teenage girl. I wasn’t equipped to deal with him during my 20’s or ever for that matter. “I’ve always lived in the largest town in my county in Indiana until 2008 when I moved to a town of 300 people I enrolled my sons in a smaller school district. It’s been my little piece of Heaven on Earth.” 

The population was higher in town during the 70’s and 80’s. Back before the town was high in unemployment and low on decent paying jobs. When the Chrysler plant shut down it completely devastated our area. Families moved away to find any kind of job opportunities with higher wages. Unless you were able to drive over an hour from home to Indianapolis for your job, then you were stuck in a town where there weren’t enough jobs to go around. This county is now mostly made up of small farming communities, commuters, a handful of small factories that are still in operation and some small businesses that still can be found around here. Not much has changed over the years, except for most of the bars closed down, with some new churches springing up and we’ve got a Walmart Super Center on the edge of town. 

I had my kids when I was 28 and 29. They’re 15 months and 7 days apart in age. My sons are my true loves and the greatest accomplishment in my life. I’ve got two men that’ll love me after I die. What more could I ask for? I’m still figuring out if I’m actually needed as their Mom now days or just a sounding board for the them when they’re excited or stressed out about life. I saw TE at the local Walmart when I was pregnant with my oldest son and he looked like a decimated corpse. Time has been unkind to him or karma must’ve caught up with the man. I’m still clueless about any man who’s interested in me as a person, not just a woman to have in their bedroom, the kitchen or to be a mother their children. Kids over age over 18 are okay since they’re supposed to be somewhat capable of adulting on their own. I’ve already raised my two sons who are now 19 and 21 years old. I’m done with babies until I get my first grand baby. For now I have a grand pup named Xander that I get to love on and spoil some. 

At 21 years of age all I was interested in was being able to drink beer in any bar I wanted in my little redneck town. I loved my beer, dancing and live music. I was a decent pool player and I loved bowling with my family or friends on an old fashioned game machine. The kind that actually had small pins to knock down using a little bowling ball like those big table top shuffleboard games. I’m sure those little bowling balls were used as weapons on more than one occasion. This was before video games took over all the choices in game playing, that we now play them all the time, except for when there’s a pool table around. This has been a good memory or two revisited.   

    ♪•♥ FrostyGurl♥•♪

 ♪•♥PeaceLoveMusic♥•♪

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“Snapshots in my Mind”

I was going through the pictures on my computer and it brought up memories of my vacation from last fall with Dad and my oldest son. There’s a photograph of Dad with Betty Boop at Universal Studios that’s really good. There’s others from that day, but this one is my favorite. 

I’ve captured memories in my mind that are snapshots of a time I want to remember. Sometimes I step back while something is happening to imprint one of those snapshots in my mind. Our best memories of people who have touched our lives are in our hearts. They live on through us by being the best part of our mind and heart. It’s okay to recall good times and even the bad ones since it’s a great comfort to remember them in any way. I wish I would have taken pictures of the last holidays we had with my Dad. That’s a mistake I won’t make I the future.  
°•♪FrostyGurl♪•°

PeaceLoveMusic

“Magical Friend”

She’s not just my best friend, she’s my magical friend. I’ve been best friends with Mel for over 30 years. We were teenagers when we met. Looking back on it, we thought we were so grown up but we were just a couple of babies. She’s magical in how we’ve gone our separate ways more than a few times, but we come back together when we need each other the most. 

She had her kids before I did and moved out of state when her oldest was a baby. Ten years later I had my sons and she called me one night while she was in town. We kept in touch and visited back and forth with one another for a couple of years.  Then we got caught up in our lives and raising our sons.  We went for years without being able to get in touch with each other.  I was suffering from empty nest syndrome and depression and came across her son on Facebook. I’d been searching for her on social media since it came out. I messaged her son, and she called me the next day.


She’s a single mother too, and has been through most of the same things that I have been through over the years. Neither of us had a close female friend at the time and it felt like we had come home when we heard the sound of the others voice. 

We talk 2 or 3 times a week if not more. It’s like no time had passed since we talked last. Mentally we’re still those two young women who have always loved each other like sisters even though we’re now middle aged.  She lives 175 miles from me and somehow I’ll find a way to get to see her. Thank God for cell phones because we’d have long distance phone bills we’d be paying. 

Neither time or geography has kept us apart. I hope everyone has one magical friend in their life.

°•♪FrostyGurl♪•°

PeaceLoveMusic

“Thinking about my Dad”

I often procrastinate, usually justify it or rationalize why I have no time to blog since my Dad died unexpectedly. He collapsed on January 3, 2017 around noon and that’s actually when his soul left us for a better place than here. His body died on January 7, 2017. His broken body remained behind here on Earth, but it wasn’t the Dad I knew and loved. His soul was housed in a shell that was his human body. His soul didn’t die, but his shell was too broken to continue life as we knew it to be.

My grief is unbearably private, lonely and cannot be said out loud for fear of choking on my screams or the inability to stop them. My life completely changed in less than three minutes, but it took four days for my Dad to have his final peace. We had a priest come and read the sacrament of the sick and dying, also known as The Last Rites, which comforted my Grandma with her religion. I might have bungled the name of the prayer, but I know his sisters also said their rosaries. These timeless acts of religion done in devotion in the name of love were from their lips to God’s ears.

The only way I deal with everyday decisions is by doing things the way my Dad always told me about “how to get things done.”

Here’s a few of my Dad’s life lessons:

1) To be a better person today than I was yesterday, and pray to be even better tomorrow.

2) To always help someone in need because there may not be anyone else who will or can do a good deed just because it needs to be done.

3) Be understanding and thoughtful with your words, not all scars are visible.

4) Always be kind to others since you haven’t walked in any shoes but your own.

My Dad was a junior high school science teacher, head coach of the varsity football team and coached various other sports over his years before he retired for a rural county school corporation on the south end of Henry County, Indiana. He was a valued mentor for students and football players who were considered “his kids”. One was a girl he called Jethro. They didn’t always want to hear what had to say to them, but they still listened to his words of wisdom from years of life experience. Those pearls of wisdom to those he called his own, will be remembered for the rest of their lives.

He helped and encouraged students, sports players and young adults both on or off the football field or in and out of his classroom. My Dad was a rock solid man and he was my hero. Sometimes a hero to people only Dad knew about.  Often times he took kids under his wing whether they knew it or not at the time is unclear except for the love and respect that has been shown to him in life as well as in death. I didn’t realize just how many lives my Dad touched till after the stories we heard at the funeral home, and the private memories shared with my Mom, Grandma and I.
My Dad was a respected, honorable and was a dignified man in a plethora of ways. He also a hoot and trickster. He loved a good prank and funny jokes. On rare occasion, or Crown Royal, he could be an offensive ass with a wicked sense of humor. He was extremely funny without trying and usually didn’t realize it until after the fact.

I can almost hear him in my mind, but sadly I’m forgetting how his voice sounded. Knowing he’s in a better place now and waiting for us where it’s not hard to be his old self makes it somewhat easier on my heart. Like he was before his stroke with no struggles or worries and no more constant pain. He’s got a cooler full of ice cold Bud Light on his golf cart on an exotic course somewhere warm with all those that passed on before he did. He’s in good company with his crooked little smile on his face and laughing about how life isn’t fair. Life had taken my Dad to exotic, far away places he thoroughly enjoyed visiting while on his travels while he served in the US Navy on the USS Bainbridge as a navigator during the Veitnom conflict.  I’ll never get to venture to any of them, but I remember how happy he was when spoke of the places he visited during that time of his life. He continued his travels with my Mom. They went from Indiana to Florida,  Washington down through California back through the Colorado Rockies and a Mexican cruise. Even with all the advancements made in medical sciences and the new technologies developed daily they couldn’t help my Dad so he could fight the good fight one more time.  You see, his broken body had suffered previously from too much trauma. He’d had multiple heart attacks, an arterial stroke in his brain and he cheated death three times.  It just wasn’t in his destiny to stay here any longer with us and he didn’t want to leave us. If it was his choice, then he’d have stayed with us.

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°•♪FrostyGurl♪•°

PeaceLoveMusic

“I Blog”

I’m finally learning how to use WordPress on my desktopI’m still using Windows 8.1 on my old HP, my poor old Hewlett Packard has had a rough lifespan, I can’t seem to download the latest version of WordPress on my HP. That’s been the most aggravating part my confusion over Pingbacks and Trackbacks, needing to use a desktop or laptop to do them correctly. I can use the WordPress mobile app for Android really well, except for copy and pasting the site addresses. I use four devices with mobile app’s downloaded on them and I actually understand them so much better. They’re touch screen devices to and much easier to navigate than my keyboard for my HP. 

I’m starting to be able to use my blog sites the way I wanted for the last year. I’m even remembering how to use the options I’ve been using on the features for the last week or so.  After completing one of my personal blogging missions, I was able to do the button for my “Menu” to put it on my “Home” page. The theme that I’m using has this option of a “Home” as a free feature. I’m a “Happy Camper” today, because I taught myself how to find the answers to my own questions, all by myself for the most part. I was using this website: https://wordpress.org

I also checked the FAQS pages that are offered on the wordpress.org to offer help to anyone who needs it. I’ve been mostly having problems with these confusing Pingbacks.  Not using a PC of some kind makes them nearly impossible to accomplish on a mobile device. I use the WordPress for Android on my Samsung and Motorola devices. This is really a great app that’s nicely developed and looks user friendly,  but it’s not a desktop. I think that I’ll be using my old HP since it’s less complicated for completing the process for these Pingbacks. I haven’t done Trackbacks yet. After I master the Pingbacks then I’m getting right on to those Trackbacks soon enough!! Watch out Pingbacks I’m meaning some serious business from now on!!  As soon as I’m able to learn how to do them with the ease of it being second nature for me to be making them with one hand!!

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I‘ve watched 2 or 3 tutorials that were sent to me by a very nice author here on WordPress. He took the time out of his busy schedule to help me, answered some questions and then he sent me some emails with links. I followed the links directly to the website and they were thorough in their explanations.  Another great author who’s kind of took me under her wing, has patiently listened, read my all of  my emails, comments, and all of them with questions. I was confused about too much at one time, but she stayed calm and collected and helped me understand some blogging terms. 

Also, I’ve read about several interesting topics offered in the forums.  There’s people who write in and ask questions that I haven’t had time to think up yet. Most of these topics I was unable to figure out on my own, so these forums are an excellent source of information about the WordPress blogging site. A glossary is included on the wordpress.org website. I adore glossaries, dictionaries and encyclopedias. They’re all my favorites and I appreciate them most of all!! I figured out on my own how to use the Dashboard. It has easy to use options for the customizer provided. It has a preview button so you know what it’s going to look like before you “save and publish” something you, Customized to the theme you choose to use on your site. I suggest taking your time to see what each option is for, what it does and how it’s going to look after you get it done. It’s a lot easier to go back to make any changes if you remember what you did with it in beginning when you first set up your theme. I definitely took my time, going step by step for each of the options in the theme I activated on my blog site. I basically understood how other themes needed to be set up. If I do say so myself, they’re all three looking pretty good for a newbie like me. I spent three days on my three blog sites and I’m proud of how they turned out.

The dashboard has the greatest benefits and it’s extremely important since it has everything you need all together in one place to create your blog. To go straight to your Dashboard use your Blog URL and add /wp-admin onto the end of your URL. Like this:  https://littlegiablog.wordpress.com/wp-admin <FrostyGurlsRamblings> is one of my other blog sites on here. The features in the dashboard are numerous.  There’s also self explanatory options on setting up a blog site the way you want to. I’m now capable of viewing and editing my saved drafts with ease as well as my drafts that are to be posted automatically at the time I scheduled it to upload onto one of my blogs. I like to edit the articles that I previously published when I first started blogging on here. While I was attempting to write articles without any knowledge of how or what to write in a blog. I asked myself what should it be about or should it stand for something?  I was still publishing most of what I was writing. I’m more selective about what I publish. I take great pride in stringing my words together in an interesting style that doesn’t cause one to have a brain freeze with the pain of my illiterate writings. I’ve changed the settings on my themes and my profile settings more times than I’m willing to put down in this article. 

Since I’m a beginner in the blogging world and the blog community, I continuously watch for any improvement with my own writing skills and my style. I always need to know if I can improve myself and how can my writing get better. I’m obsessed about using correct grammar, vocabulary, spelling and punctuation.  I prefer to use eye catching designs
and layouts with interesting images, pictures or photos, to accompany all my writings. I’ve published some that need spiffed up a little. I frequently change my public profile and the information I’ve written about myself can be found on the “About” page.  It’s located on the front page of my home page under the “Menu” tab together with my “Contact” form to follow me on WordPress. The home page is where my blogs can be easily found.  Please read what strikes your fancy. I hope you enjoy what you choose to read!! My  “Contact” form, “About” page and my “Home” page on all three of my blog sites are for anyone interested in who I am, where I’ve been, why I’m weird and where I’d like to end up someday.

The internet is like a permanent ink pen or better yet a Sharpie, because once it’s out there it cannot be erased like a number two pencil that’s used for homework assignments where you’ve answered questions wrong on your paper, but you’re given a chance to correct it for half the credit of the assignment. The “World Wide Web” isn’t as forgiving as the teachers we had in our youth. What works for me on my blog sites may not work for anyone else. There’s a method to my madness, it’s just not for everyone!!

Follow along with me and take a trip through my chaotic mind. At least I’m funny, I literally crack myself up and have a great sense of humor. I can laugh at myself and laugh with you. Sometimes my humor isn’t for the ones that offend easy, but you can take my word for it that I don’t purposely hurt other people’s feelings. My brother has Cerebral Palsy and I’m not going to have anyone be mean to someone with a developmental disability when I’m around.

Any and all advice, words of wisdom or constructive criticism about my writings would greatly appreciated!!
°•♪FrostyGurl♪•° 
PeaceLoveMusic

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“Special birthday”

Today is my brother’s 48th birthday who was born with cerebral palsy and is in a wheelchair. Brother is the best man I know. He’s kind, patient and very funny. I feel lucky to be his sister and have this close relationship we share. I’d do just about anything for him except feed him hot dogs. Today marks another milestone for the whole family, being together without our Dad. It’s a sad but beautiful day because Brother is having another day to celebrate. We’re making a weekend out of it. Today is dinner and birthday cake. Tomorrow is our last game of the season with his Miracle League baseball team with it our trophy day and the annual cookout. The cookout is for all players, coaches (I’m the assistant coach) and the Buddies who help the players on the ball field. On Sunday we’re doing what he asked for his birthday present, that is going to the casino where he can play the slot machines. I’m not a gambler but I’ll enjoy this outing regardless. I’m hoping he hits a jackpot just to see him get excited. He barely slept last night knowing today was his day. I baked his lemon supreme cake and it’s cooling now so I ice it before everyone gets here. Today is a very special day for a very special man. Brother is my only sibling and I got the best brother is the world. Just ask me and I’ll tell you how lucky I am to have him.

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°•♪FrostyGurl♪•°

PeaceLoveMusic

 

“Coffee became date number two”

So Mr. Coffee and I had another date. We went out for dinner over the weekend and took a long drive. It was a really nice summer evening that accompanied us on our country cruise. I like the way he talks. A lot. His twang is more from the deep south than Indiana. He’s definitely got those southern gentleman manners to match his southern accent. He’s got a great sense of humor and really is the definition of a nice guy.  Considering I’m 49 years old that I’ve actually dated one too many of those Bad Boys and a few of the Mr. Nice Guys. My opinion is that the Mr. Nice Guy is the best to date if you don’t want to play mind  games since they won’t leave you hanging or guessing what’s going on. They actually show you they’re interested and you usually know where you stand with them. But those Bad Boys used to be my favorite until I got to know that they played dating games. Not to mention they’ve never cared if you were looking for more than a night out somewhere.  Or should I say a night out alone where no one saw you two together. So those unreliable Bad Boys usually get stuck with Unstable Girls.  You know the kind of woman you won’t be friends with because of the principle of the matter. You’re not friends with that kind of crazy.

Mr. Nice Guy sometimes isn’t all that fun, but you can count on him in ways those Bad Boys can’t even comprehend. Mr. Nice Guy likes to make a plan to see you and he’s  good for  his word.

All parents love the Mr. Nice Guy you introduce to them especially Momma’s.

I know this because I’ve raised two sons that are 19 and 20 years old. One is Mr. Nice Young Man, he’s 19, who’s in a long term relationship. There’s also his brother the Butthead Young Man, he’s 20, who’s still single.  My sons are very polite and well mannered. Except they’re Buttheads like most of the male species I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. One just a little bit more than the other.

°•♪FrostyGurl♪•°

PeaceLoveMusic